The Steps Toward Marriage

This week in family relations we talked about the steps towards marriage. The first step is dating. This means  dating a variety of people. After you date many people, you may find one person you want to get to know more. This is when you move onto the second step. The second step is courtship. Courtship means that you are exclusively dating one person. This is a trial for marriage, seeing who well you get along and would do together. The third step is engagement. Engagement means you have a ring and date for the wedding. During engagement several steps must take place as well. These steps are: making decisions together, practice sacrificing for each other, establish boundaries, problem solving, relying on each other. After engagement the fourth and final step in marriage.

Another topic that we discussed that I thought was interesting was the importance of involving the father in the pregnancy. Mothers are obviously building that relationship with the baby during the pregnancy and then afterwards take care of that baby while the father is away at work. Often times the father doesn't feel that special connection to the baby because they mother does all the caring for it even when he comes home because she may not trust him to care for a baby. This is why it is so important to involve the father. Take him to doctor appointments, take him shopping for baby stuff, let him feel when the baby kicks, and most importantly, let him be there doing the birth of the baby.

What is Love?

This week in family relations the topic was preparing for marriage. One of the chapters in our book we read is titled "Falling in Love." What caught my attention in this chapter was the meaning of love. The word love has four ancient Greek words translated into love. The first is Storge. Storge is the love and affection between parents and their children. In class we defined this love as a commitment, responsibility and connection. The second word for love is Philia. This term refers to the love between friends. It is a brotherly love. I think this is the most common use of the word love. Friends tell say they love each other all the time. But what do we mean by "I love you" when its said to our best friend? It's not meant in the same way we would say it to our significant other. Which is the third word for love, Eros. Eros is physical love. It is romantic and lustful. The last Greek word for love is Agape. This is the love you feel for someone you  may not know. It is charity and compassionate. You see people on the News suffering from a natural disaster and you feel bad for them, this is Agape. You don't know them, but you feel for them and want to help them. So next time you throw out the word "love" think in what way you mean it.

Men vs. Women

Men and women are different despite varies arguments that we are the same and should be treated identical. This week we had to watch a video clip about the differences in men and women. Some argue there is absolutely no difference but the only differences arise because we raise our children in a certain way. One women on the video said that we need to raise our sons more like our daughters. But then wouldn't our sons get teased to no end? I don't think it is right to discriminate people because of their sex, but suing a dry cleaner shop because they charge more for women's shirt because they take longer or suing a barber shop because they charge women more for hair cuts because the have more hair and it takes longer, is taking it a little far. Heavenly Father intended for us to be different. His sons play an important role as the providers and protectors while women play an important role as the nurturing mothers. I think sometimes we are so into making sure that every is treated the exact same, we forget to remember that we aren't the exact same. And if we were, well the world would be a boring place.

A Lesson In Judging

Many people when they see a Mexican family speaking in rapid fire Spanish they are not able to understand, think "Seriously? Go back to Mexico." This is terrible. But honestly, who hasn't thought this or something similar.
This week we got to look into the lives of Mexican families who immigrant to America. As I spent over an hour reading about 10 Mexican families and their trials, I gained a new respect for them. They go through so much and suffer tremendous amounts of stress and changes just so their children can have a better life. Many times the father comes over to America first to establish a job and living place. It can take many years for the rest of the family to come to America. And by the time they do everything has changed, and most importantly the family dynamic is completely different. Dad hasn't been there for years, so what makes him the boss suddenly? Many of these families in the article we read for Friday's homework, talked about teenagers who didn't feel close to their father. These teenagers missed their close knit family they had back in Mexico, including their aunts, uncles, cousins, and even grandparents. Now in America with no family and Mom and Dad at work all day, these teenagers get incredibly lonely. They suffer depression and sometimes suicidal thoughts. That life style can't be easy.
So next time a big Mexican family is in your way in the grocery store and you start to think a mean thought, just think: they are people too, who have probably suffered more than you know. Everyone has their trials. You can't judge a book by its cover. You never know what its holding back.